This week I've been delivering coaching and media training to senior leaders at an organisation in London. And what struck me - not for the first time, but perhaps more clearly than ever - is just how powerful the right question can be.

The right question creates reflection, shifts perspective, and unlocks something that no amount of external instruction can reach. I've watched it happen in real time, in rooms with TV broadcasters, radio hosts, senior leaders, and business owners - people who are accomplished, credible, and experienced.

The one thing they often have in common - they fear and doubt their expertise, so if that's you right now, you are in very good company.

In this post, I'm sharing the five coaching questions I return to again and again with clients who are working on their communication and speaking goals. As you read through, hold a specific speaking opportunity in mind - a presentation, a podcast, a media interview, a panel, a workshop - and answer each question with that in mind.

How I came to coaching - and why it changed everything

My journey with coaching started well before I knew what coaching actually was. I'd always had this desire to get the best out of other people - holding friends accountable to goals, cheering them on, supporting them along the way. Looking back, I'd been doing it for years.

Before COVID, I was working four days a week in London as a Producer, barely seeing my children during the week. When everything stopped in 2020 and we all spent more time at home, I began to wonder what might be next for me. I did a lot of research and sought out a career coach - the brilliant Caroline Wellingham, who I'm still in contact with to this day. Through a series of coaching exercises and questions, she helped me see that my strengths and skillset could be applied to other things. Coaching came out on top.

It's worth mentioning that coaching is an unregulated industry - anyone can call themselves a coach. But it was really important to me to complete a formal qualification, so I studied for two years with The Coaching Academy and came out with a qualification accredited by the International Coaching Federation. They say your first client is yourself, and they weren't wrong. Learning about coaching was completely transformational and I wouldn't have achieved half of what I have without taking that path.

When I started my business, coaching absolutely needed to be part of what I was doing. Seeing clients transform their thinking patterns, behaviours, and habits, building skills they carry for life - is what I truly get joy from.

What coaching actually is (and why it works alongside media training)

Coaching is the process of taking someone from where they are now to where they want to be. It helps unlock potential, builds confidence, and raises self-awareness so that intentional steps towards meaningful goals happen faster than they would alone.

In my work specifically, coaching and media training work in tandem. Media training is the practical side: how the media works, what journalists are looking for, how to shape your messaging, how to use stories and stay calm under pressure. Coaching is what sits alongside it - building the belief in what you say, the confidence to say it, and the ability to overcome the doubts that can undermine even the most well-prepared speaker.

Because it's one thing knowing what to say in an interview. It's another thing entirely trusting yourself enough to say it with confidence, credibility, and conviction.

1. What would success look like for you?

When we go into speaking opportunities thinking ‘just don't mess this up,’ we're focusing entirely on avoiding failure. Instead, ask yourself: what does success actually look like here? Is it feeling calm throughout? Speaking at a measured pace? Landing your key messages? Being remembered by the audience? Everyone's answer is different and that's exactly the point. This question gives you something concrete to move towards rather than something vague to move away from. Where would you sit on a scale of one to ten for your upcoming opportunity? And what would a ten look like?

2. What's truly stopping you or holding you back?

What we say is holding us back, is rarely the whole story. I don't have time right now. It's not the right moment. These are surface-level answers. Underneath them, almost always, is something deeper - fear of judgment, fear of getting it wrong, fear of being visible, fear of rejection.

Until we stop long enough to name what's actually there, it continues to drive our decisions quietly in the background - keeping us small, keeping us safe, and keeping us stuck. When you identify what's truly holding you back, it begins to lose its power over you.

3. Tell me about a time when you've been proud of how you've used your voice.

Most people come to communication coaching focused entirely on what they haven't done yet. This question shifts the lens completely - it asks: what evidence do you already have that you can do this?

Maybe you spoke up in a meeting when it would have been easier to stay quiet. Maybe you delivered a presentation that landed well. Maybe you advocated for someone else or shared an opinion that mattered. You have done hard things before. Reconnecting with that evidence builds belief and belief builds trust in your voice.

4. What would your 90-year-old self tell you to do?

This question asks you to take a leap forward to the end of your life and look back - to see your current decision from the perspective of someone who has the full picture. And what it does, reliably, is create an instant perspective on what actually matters.

Your 90-year-old self is almost certainly not saying stay safe, wait until you feel ready, don't risk it. They're saying go for it. Say yes. Life is too short to let fear make the decision. We rarely regret giving things a go. We frequently regret not trying at all.

5. What support do you need?

The instinct for most high-achieving people is to try to do everything alone. But support isn't a sign of weakness - it's a sign of self-awareness. You've identified something you want to get better at, and you're willing to invest in making that happen.

Support looks different for everyone: feedback from a trusted peer, an accountability partner, learning a specific skill, or investing in coaching or media training. The question is simply: what do you need to move forwards? And are you willing to ask for it?

A final reflection

Across every coaching conversation I have - whether with a senior leader, a business owner, or someone just beginning their visibility journey - these five questions do the same thing. They create clarity, shift perspective, and move people from I'm not sure I'm ready, to, I know what I need to do next.

You don't need to have all the answers before you start, you just need to start asking better questions.

So, what speaking opportunity have you been putting off? And which of these five questions does it most need you to sit with?

Prefer Audio?

You can also listen to this episode on my podcast: She Speaks to Scale.

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Download my free 5 minute camera confidence audio here

How To Work With Me

I'm Sarah Collins - Media trainer, Communication Coach, and former Senior Television Producer for ITV & ITN. I work with ambitious founders and spokespeople in businesses to help them communicate with clarity, confidence, and composure in the moments that matter most. If you've got a podcast, interview, or speaking opportunity coming up and you want to feel truly ready for it, this is how we can work together:

Founders who want to become an expert voice in their field

Organisations who want their representatives to become credible spokespeople

Photos by: Photo byKanhaiya Sharma onUnsplash, vitaly-gariev-m76kVfIRS5U-unsplash